Up Coon Mountain

Ignorance IS bliss. Had we known what the short but rocky hike up Coon Mountain in Westport was like, we might have not done it. But it turns out the La Lu is a champion hiker! And Waylon was happy to face out in the Moby on the way out, and in on the way back. We stayed at the summit for a couple of hours, lunching, hawk and eagle and turkey vulture watching, and greeting every other hiker who came along. The weather was glorious and in the 60s...Happy Spring!

Before dinner, I took Eva for a walk around the block. Sort of. It's not really a block per se, but it makes a square and it is paved, so I call it the block! We tossed rocks in the stream of run-off that goes from the woods and through the park. We squished some mud. And we went to the playground. We also marveled at the police activity at the youth center and watched the teenagers play basketball and flirt with one another. The whole thing was so delightful that I don't care if Waylon doesn't sleep through the night. Sort of. It would be nice though!

Tomorrow we plan on hiking Coon Mountain. Spring feels surer and surer.

Missing

Lately I have been feeling an emptiness in the part of me where friendship lives. My life is so full in so many other ways...family, work, love...but as far as pure girlfriend time goes, I've got nothing. I have wonderful friends, it is just that I never see them. And after a while of not seeing them, I feel like distance grows. If not for the great lunches at work, my once a month book club, and one or two phone calls a week, I'd feel completely alone.

And yet...I just can't seem to figure out how to make friend time in my life. Getting to book club alone is a feat in and of itself. Phone calls are interrupted. A girls' evening out? I've had one in the past year and a half. (Work events do NOT count.) 2 small kiddos, rural living far from my existing network of girls, no local babysitter and a husband without a 9-5 work schedule...it all makes it so complicated.

When I was a kid, my mom never hung out with her friends. I always wondered why. But now I know. And talking to some of my friends, even the ones without kids, we all seem to have this same problem. I have one friend, a single mom, who actually goes out and dates and I have no clue how she manages. When I hear about moms with social lives I am completely baffled..how do you do it? Do you talk about things other than kids with your pals?

I need to do what Bill and I always talk about...invite all the people we like over for dinners. (Not all at once though...I don't want to be that social!) So expect an invitation if you live within 60 miles of me!

Judging a Fridge by Its Cover

This fridge couldn't belong to anyone than fly fishing, gun toting, liberal voting, Spongebob watching, fashion loving, nature museum exploring, family picture taking, sarcastic joking, bird watching, toys-that-make-noise hating and loving, small child rearing, mediocre gardening us.

And yes, some one wrote sex with the leap frog letters. But I have no idea if they did it on purpose.

Riding the Wave

I realize that the title of this post might make you think I was back to, um, peak fertility. But no. I am instead talking about the wave of motivation I got from the professional association meeting I attended at lunchtime. I left feeling pumped up anew and ready to tackle the least favorite part of my job....actually asking folks for money. It's true...I am a professional fundraiser who hates to ask. Just as 95% of the general public would hate it. And, I venture to say, probably 90% of my fellow fundraisers. But we love hearing YES so we do it. And really, it is not the ask I hate. It is making the first phone call. By the time I get to asking I am good to go. But anyway, a colleague at another organization spoke to us and I left our meeting ready to make all the calls I have been avoiding. (I also left as treasurer of our association...how did THAT happen?)

And then...

And then I got pulled in to read a grant, and had to return three phone calls, and then reschedule a meeting. Then I had to run to an eye doc appointment. And to day care. And so it goes. I couldn't procrastinate so well I wanted too! Here's hoping the tide is still high when I get to the office tomorrow!

In other news, I am back to contacts and my face feels nekkid. Tried hard to get a nice picture of the 3 of us...oh well.

If this doesn't look like Spring, you have ever experienced a real winter. Everyday I search for signs. Softer ice. Red Winged Black Bird. The golden tones of a sleeping lawn yawing awake. We are desperate here.

Mud Season

Date night

The gods smiled and between the subsiding of sinus pain and a beginning of a migraine I was able to pig out at A Single Pebble and rock out to Lucinda Williams. She has a voice like you wouldn't believe live. Her recorded voice is good, but live? So amazing. And you can not beating eating grown up food and adult drinks with your beloved, and without kids once in a while.

Just as you can't beat fun with photo booth and a baby.

Making an Effort

When E was 9 months old I wrote this on my blog...

"I've been trying to Make An Effort. You know, actually put some product in my hair, wear shoes with heels (instead on Danskos everyday), dress semi-professionally. And I think it's working. This, along with the weight loss, is making me feel a little better about myself. Because my self-image since becoming a mom is at an all time low...probably because so much of my life has been tied to my body since April of last year. When you are pregnant its ALL about the body and how much you've gained and how big you look and how you feel and so on. Then, the nursing business, which I've written about before. Team that with how you feel physically when sleep deprived and you've got a match made in hell. I've been in mourning lately for the body I never really enjoyed when I had it. I used to brush off compliments, and was never that comfortable showing off my assets, as it were. And now I wish I had revelled in that hot bod! So I need to start being happier with the one I have now, which gets better everyday. I just wish I could shrink my belly skin the way you shrink a sweater...If I could take a hot shower and then hit my tummy with the blowdryer and make it tight again, that would be awesome.

I took me every minute of those 9 months to get where I am less than 3 months after Way's birth. It's a total change in expectations, I think. And also a different pregnancy and 20 lbs less weight gain. I just wish we weren't broke now so I could buy clothes. I anm trying to be creative with the 10 things that fit, but I'm no stylist.

Everytime I go to blog someone starts to cry.

And while I can cure most of Waylon's crying with the boob, it is hard to type one handed. Which reminds me of what I wanted to blog about...

I have about a weeks worth of breast milk in my freezer. And I am only now, almost three months in, convinced that my supply is not going to be a problem like it was with Eva. I pump more than he can eat at daycare, a full 4 to 5 ozs more. Part of this is that when I drop him off I feed him and that holds him til noon, so he only has time for two bottles during the day care day. But with Eva, one session would hold her an hour or two,at most, so we supplemented. She was well into half formula feedings by three months.

I've also become bolder in my public nursing, thanks to experience and the Moby Wrap. I share a list of were I have nursed him thus far...

at the mall
in the grocery store - while still shopping
on the exam table at my doctor's office. during a pap smear.
in the Saranac Lake ice palace
on the side of Main Street in SL watching a parade
while hiking
in countless restaurants
in my office
in the conference room at work while meeting with a co-worker
during conference calls
on the ski slopes at whiteface (I was NOT on skis)
while writing this blog post.

Oh well...I did some cooking, but wasn't as nearly as productive as I thought I would be. Instead, I remembered that I had a blog before the one I had before this one! And I spent a bunch of time reading the me of 6 years ago.

Silence is Golden

Spring must be coming to Winkytown. The red wing black birds have been seen (but not by me), I can see all the mud in the driveway and in front of the house, and Bill is counting down til fishing season. He took La Lou off to Saratoga to a paddlesports show today and Waylon and I have plans for cleaning and cooking and cooing and pooping. Maybe even some more blogging. Oh how I love the quiet that is only ONE screaming child.

Unrelated, I swear

What I am about to say might seem to be related to the last post, but I swear that it is not: I hate being touched right now.

I read about this when I was nursing Eva, but never experienced it. But this time...oh my lord. When we get home Way wants to be on me, touching me, nursing all the time til he goes to bed. By the time he is snug in his bassinet, I can't get alone enough! And this may make me a bad person/mom to admit, but I especially get annoyed with Eva touching me these days. I am all about our kisses and hugs, but the rest of the hanging-on-me-like-a-monkey makes me INSANE.

I get over it by the middle of the night though, since I keep waking up smooshed up against Bill. Or maybe I am just being a bed hog.

Dear Husband...

My darling,
Please know that when forced to decide between pillow talk and the longest stretch amount of uninterrupted sleep I've had since December...I will choose the sleep. It doesn't mean I don't love you. It means go write whatever it is down so you can tell me in morning. Love you to bits!
Your wife.

And not to be greedy, but when is my boy going to sleep eight hour stretches? I would never have dreamed of asking that of La Lou at 11 weeks, but I know he has it in him. He's such a good sleeper and hardly nurses at all at 2am. But he still wakes and cries.